Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Fuuuuuuuck

My 24th birthday is a couple weeks away. Do you know what feels like it just happened a couple months ago? My 23rd birthday.

August 18, 2010, is closing in upon us. But, August 18, 2009, just doesn't feel like it was a year ago.

I don't understand where the last year of my life went. At the beginning of last summer, I came up with a list of things I'd like to get accomplished. I didn't get any of them done. A few months ago, I realized it was summer again and I could accomplish them this time. Again, they didn't get done.

The last 5 or 6 months in particular have just been a blur. I attribute it mainly to not having any real stimulation in my life. I do the same thing every day, every week, every month, etc... and I've finally started to realize it.

I don't like to use the term "dropped out of school," but I guess that's what I did. I prefer the term "took a break." Anyway, I took a break from school last semester thinking it would help recharge me mentally. I just got burnt out of school and thought a break would help me.

It didn't. I just became a walking zombie. I know it's hard to comprehend how you can just wake up one day and realize that half the year passed before you. But, that's what happened. I realized my birthday was coming up and suddenly wondered where all the time went.

I'm just in a rut, I guess. Maybe I'll get out of it soon. I've realized there's a problem in my life and I know that I need to correct it.

Will I? Ehhhhh... We'll see.

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